Are you single? Do you want to learn how to get a girlfriend using science?
A circle and a triangle could be the key to your next date. Here’s a triangle, and here’s a circle. Here’s a whole bunch of them, triangle, circle, triangle, circle, triangle, circle and so on.
Now take a moment and look at this screen. What do you see?
I want you to be honest. Did you see rows of circles and triangles from left to right or do you see columns of circles and columns of triangles?
I already know the answer. Those circles and triangles hold the key to helping you overcome the fear of approaching the people you’re attracted to.
Does that make sense? How about I explain things a little further?
Human beings have a flaw, but it’s a flaw that has kept us alive for thousands of years. We see patterns, and we see them in everything.
Whether you like it or not, your brain is great at combining things that shouldn’t be connected and finding ways to make sense out of them for one simple reason, to keep you alive.
Imagine this scenario, you’re walking along a path late at night and earlier in the day you read a news report of a wild panther that escaped and had been spotted in your neighborhood. Suddenly the wind picks up and shakes a big dark bush by the side of the path.
Now you’ve walked past that bush a hundred times before and even heard the wind rattle it before, but this time it’s different. This time you’re wondering if it was the panther you read about earlier.
Even though logic dictates that it’s probably just the wind, your brain will connect the dots for a very good reason. It’s safer to assume there is a panther in the bush and then find out it was just the wind rather than to assume it was just the wind and have it be a hungry panther.
How you react to that fear will be based on your fear response. There are two common fear responses most people are aware of and a third that people don’t always know. The first two are fight or flight, and the third is to stand still.
When you’re confronted with that bush, you may decide to investigate and prepare to attack whatever is inside it. That would be the fight reflect.
You may decide to move in the other direction and give it a wide berth. That would be the flight reflex.
Finally, you may pause to see if the bush keeps moving once the wind stops. This is the stand still reflex, almost like playing dead. It’s actually the most common reflex as it can always be followed by one of the other two, if necessary.
More than likely the one you will choose will be based on whichever you’ve chosen in previous, similar situations. Someone that handles the unknown by fighting or investigating in the past is likely to do the same again. Of course, someone who has moved away or stood still in the past is likely to repeat that behavior. This is another pattern.
Whichever fear response kept you alive in the last situation is the fear response your instincts would choose for the next one. Your unconscious brain figures sticking with the proven method will give you the maximum chance of staying alive, and life goes on.
What has this got to do with your dating life?
It’s actually really simple. Your brain operates exactly the same way with any situation that scares you. If you’ve seen someone you really want to talk to, and yet you’ve frozen up and have not spoken to them or worse, you found an excuse to get away, then your brain is going to make sure that you keep doing that. After all, it’s been the best way of keeping you safe from emotional rejection and embarrassment in the past.
The people you see approaching and getting into relationships with all the hotties in the world, their natural reflex is the fight response.
They’ve learned that by approaching the people they’re attracted to, the fear is replaced by hot, steamy make out sessions and sex, so they keep doing it.
The point being, if you’ve always been afraid to approach someone, then you always will be. Your chances of dating someone you’re really attracted to are pretty damn slim. Of course, you could choose to change that, and I’d like to help you.
There are only five common problems that hold people back from really excelling with the opposite sex.
- The first is not knowing how to approach someone you really want to talk to.
- The second is not knowing how to maintain a conversation with someone.
- The third is not knowing how to have fun interactions that keep people interested.
- The fourth is not knowing how to form deep connections with people that stop them from flaking on dates with you.
- Finally, the fifth is not knowing how to make an interaction sexual and seal the deal.
And if you want to learn some simple and effective ways to solve those problems then The TAO of Badass is for you.